I'm slacking AGAIN!!

Went Dinner while waiting for MARIA to knock off @ Lucky Plaza's MCDS... MARIA is afriad of COCKROACHES!! haha!! then she accompanied me to NGEE ANN CITY in search of NB shoes that I longed for. Found none and then we went back after accompanying her to Jollibean @ CK Tang. On the way, @ the underground passageway, PAUL called and I mocked at them for being so loving... HAHA... MADE a FUSS out of it (As what my character is) -->HAHA
We were SQUEEZED in the TRAIN!! HAHA and Its so miserable!!
Thanks maria!!

I had a tiff with Dar in the early morning @ 3.30am over the phone!
I SMSed him @ 12am++ to let him know that I'm watching DVD and to hint him that I'm waiting for his calls & replies (as usual). But, things doesn't turn out the right way. I stopped the show @ 3.30am and was thinking: "So tired, he's still working... Wonder if he's still alright?" So, I called him to realise that the background was so silent.

"I'm @ home," he said.

& I teared... ...

Why does it always have to be ME that takes the initiative to call him. & I'm angry @ that moment because I wanted to wait for him to reply me or say GOODNITE and yet the next day, I've got to wake up @ 7am!! & YET he still .... .... DOTX!!
Why don't you have the feeling to call me everytime? Don't you think of me? Just for a split second? On your way home on the cab or watever also cannot??
I was devastated and, as usual, we were so silent on the phone that we couldn't stand it anymore. I only know that my tears were flowing like as if its RIVERWATER..
Of course, the volcano finally exploded and this long-term accumulation finally exploded!! I told him what I feels -.-"

I felt so relieved!! I'm not blaming him, just was very angry because he doesn't put in efforts to care for me. I felt so much like drowning but yet I know he's tired, he's tired... BUD I doesn't want him to think that I don't mind him treating me that way.
SERIOUSLY,
I missed him!! Even for the split second he's not there, I miss him!!
& soon, we calmed down and I went to sleep after bathing and everything... .. So TIRED!!

So, expectedly, I woke up @ 8.26am when I was supposed to be @ Ngee Ann Poly @ 8.30am... So, bo bianz, TAKE CAB cos I got to work @ 9.30am in SOMERSET... ... =( $20 gone!!
Reached there and installed the softwares... & I found out that they provide FREE NORTON software which i just bought with a sharing of $60 each with my BROTHER... SIANX!!!
They installed Microsoft 2007 into my lappy and a don't know what AGENT thingy... Then, went back!!

Met a kind man on the way down, finding the way out (I think should be one of the lecturers)... Reached the lobby and hengsss siaxxxx GOT people drop down from CAB!! HAHA!! So took and $20 gone again... Reached office like 10.37am and realised: "The new girl's still not here!!"

So I went to my normal routine and here I am, slacking again!!

Dar was supposed to go K @ JB with his CREWS but I disallowed him to go... ITS RAINING and I'm just worried bout the thing in there... I'm just worried, though I know I'm very selfish... LUCKILY Dar says that he also very tired so never go. BUD I got a feeling he's hating me (Is he), he sound so fierce and watever that made me so scared!

Haix... Sometimes I really wonder:

"Why am I born so sensitive and emotional? Why does I get jealous or get upset easily for a small little thing? YET, why am I so 'keep-everything-to-myself' kind of character? If I have told him the first time I had that feeling, things like this wouldn't have happened! Why am I born to suffer yet with this kind of slacking and sucky attitude? If I was to be born to suffer, WHY can't I have a positive attitude instead of this kind of slacking attitude I had now."

Haix, my second or third -Haix-.... ...

I really miss Dar so much. Just around one week from your birthday; I doesn't want to make you sad. BUD I just couldn't control my temper. I so tired that I really need a break! BUT I need $$ too!! I miss school!! School is always something that make me occupied and busy that I have to time to worry and think so much!

Why can't I just cherish school last time??



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Hugs,
Selene

♥ SELENE TEO ♥