♥ Thursday, February 14, 2008
Yesterday I went to NUH... & I saw his dad, MY HEART MELTS; that's how bad the situation was... Now I knew why he was so worried that he has no more time for me
Yup, I think I should be ok already, after crying the whole night yesterday and having a terrible nightmare this morning at 6am... This is the first time the dream was so real and when I woke up, I knew what happened in the dream and I realised I was sobbing terribly!!
Although today was tough without him spending valentine's with me, I never angry this time round... Instead, I felt guilty when I kicked up a fuss 2 days ago!! I wanted so much for this valentine's but it all turned out to be nothing like Christmas & New Year... ... All I'm afraid now is: Will it happened during my birthday?? Which is like 2 weeks later?? I dare not dream nor do I not want to spend my birthday alone!! That's my 18th birthday and I've dedicated it only to him... ... He promised me a surprise (though its not verbal) but all I'm worried now is that something will happen last minute again!!
I've been organising chalets & bbqs to celebrate my previous birthdays during these past few years but this year, I wanted so much to spend my birthday with me... ... BUT I have no confidence of even dreaming about it!! I can't imagine myself 'celebrating' my birthday alone... ... I can't do that man! Haix... ... Hope everything would be well and good...
Yesterday, the same issue surfaced... MONEY! I fret he would not have enough to pay off his dad's hospital fees... ... Especially when he is the sole-breadwinner in the family... OMGoodness...
Haix, later gotta go to NUH again and I'm so worried to see his mum... ...
KEKE... I think
I shouldn't think about the issue on promises le... If not, I'll cry again!! FINALLY see me so weak AHhUH? ... HEHE!!
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Hugs,
Selene
ISLAND BLOG UPDATED @ 10:00 AM